Leyla Aylin
This Is the Work Beneath the Work.
It’s emotional adulthood.
Radical self-ownership.
Real, courageous, deep adult intimacy.
Beyond emotional intelligence or self-improvement,
this is about deepening your
emotional and relational maturity.
So that brave, secure, alive ways of being and relating emerge organically —
and often don't resemble the scripts or skills
we’ve all been taught are “correct.”
It’s a paradigm shift in relating to yourself & others.
Why We Stay Stuck
(Even After Lots of Therapy or Self-Work)
Even the most respected therapy and spiritual approaches can keep people chasing the “right” insights, responses, meaning, soothing…
We seek to
Understand more
Communicate “correctly”
Figure out the meaning
Get partners to relate to us the 'right' way
Learn all the skills
Get our needs met
These can be vital parts of our self-discovery, but they can also become subtle ways we focus on getting something or doing something and end up self-abandoning.
Instead of stepping into our own lived center, we unintentionally turn towards something or someone else. Keeping us from ourselves and the people we want to be closer to.
So we circle frustrating patterns despite feeling so close to getting it, sometimes even after years of therapy or self-work, because no one showed us another way.
Grow An Unshakable Inner OK-ness
Stay rooted, connected & brave
even in the hardest of circumstances
even in the presence of someone else's limitations
Feel secure enough to find curiosity, connection & choice
in the natural pains and twists of deep,
intimate relationship and life.
Feel more safe in yourself
so you can show up as more of yourself,
not the modulated, therapy scripted, doing-the-work version...
but the simpler, clearer, braver you beneath.
This is the foundation of real emotional adulthood —
and the kind of deep intimacy (& even grounded spirituality) we know is possible,
yet often need a little support stepping into.
"Leyla cuts through the noise, she sees what other professionals often miss. But she does so with tenderness. She holds all the protectors, defenses, the people-pleasing, the sneaky therapeutic or spiritual ways we self-abandon, with compassion and respect...so you can find what's real underneath. Then live from that place with agency and a freeing, reality affirming (not projective) profound intimacy with self and other.
Alison Siggelkow, Psychotherapist